Wild, An untameable creature. What am I? Am I something that can be well defined? Am I something that makes little to no sense? What am I? I feel like sometimes there are so many facets to who I am and at other times I am absolutely void of any degree of depth.
1. (of an animal or plant) living or growing in the natural environment; not domesticated or cultivated.
2. uncontrolled or urestrained, especially in pursuit of pleasure.
Aren’t we all in some way wild? I have defenitely evolved into an entirely new creature since the month and a half prior. Something grew and changed inside me that erupted into this entirely fierce person that knows what she wants and strives for the things that she longs for. I think in all definitions, in all languages, in all images it has ever been portrayed in what I discoveded was true and unadulterated love.
Love, not for another human being in any sense. I mean, I’m in a relationship and I’m completely happy and safe in it, so please don’t misunderstand. I am in love with the person that lives inside of me. ME. I am strong and determined. Every day there are trials and sometimes it gets really hard to deal with. The real trick in my evolution is that I am dealing. I am taking life’s punches, I’m getting knocked down, and I’m losing myself at times. Isn’t that half of the crazy journey. I’ve also discovered great beauty. In these past few weeks I’ve learned to laugh. I’m talking about gut rumbling, ab creating, out or breath and out of mind laughing. I’ve begun creating again which I lost a long time ago. I see beauty in the little things and allow comfort in situations that normally would throw me into a anxiety attack. One of my favorite quotes is the Spanish Proverb:
“A Life Lived in Fear is a Life Half Lived.”
As the great Kurt Vonnegut says, “So it goes.” I’m living again.
Decovering this love for myself has also left me wanting more, striving for more, dealing with more, and hoping for more. The daily fight doesn’t keep me down but rrather further motivates me to prove myself. To continue to tread where people tell me no to go or maybe that I don’t belong. I am choosing the path in which my life will take and if people aren’t on board then they are not coming with.
For wild people the beauty of our journey is that there is going to be someone there that will encourage, motivate, and inspire us to move further and reach so much higher.
So why are we settling for someone or something less then we deserve. We need to own our wants, our desires, our pursuit of pleasure.